In my last post I said something that isn't true. I said that I am getting better at managing stress in my life. Wrong.
My body sent me a reminder of this recently - frequent lightheadedness and some heart palpitations thrown in for good measure, just in case I didn't get the hint from the dizziness. Message received, loud and clear.
The diagnosis? Physical symptoms of anxiety. Doctor's orders were to take a week off from work and focus on slowing things down and creating more balance and quiet in my life. And to make sure that I heeded his advice, the universe also threw in a rough bout of the common cold. I had no choice - I was forced to slow it down and focus on my health.
So why do we ignore what we know to be true when it comes to our physical and mental health? Why do we avoid doing what we know is healthy and good for us? With mental illness it is frequently a battle between the negative dialogue of depression (you aren't good enough; work harder - you have to prove yourself) with reality (you have nothing to prove; you are good enough just as you are). Honestly? The negative dialogue often wins. The negative perpetuates a cycle of depression and anxiety.
as if you were a rainbow
with gold at both ends.”
~ Aberjhani, The River of Winged Dreams
Here's the real truth: I don't have all the answers. You're shocked, I know (insert sarcasm here). But I learn a little bit more every day and what I glean from my life experiences, I apply to my journey. And what I have learned from this most recent experience is the importance of perspective and what is really important in life.
So here's my pledge to myself:
* I pledge to create pockets of quiet time in my daily work life.
* I pledge to create simplicity and avoid complication.
* I pledge to express my love every chance that I get to the ones who are important to me.
* I pledge to just breathe in and out.
Life is stressful - we can all agree on that, right? At work when I ask someone how they are, I often receive a response of "busy!" My final pledge is to not fall into that trap - I will focus on the positive.
Every day brings new lessons for us. And really, what is the point of life if we don't choose to learn and grow? I shall strive for progress, not perfection. Perfection is boring, anyway.